In earlier columns, I've lamented about the poor design of cable TV connections, and the shoddy construction of sewer connections. both the fault of the accessory manufacturers. Well, you factory guys can relax; today's first gripe relates to the campground operator whose hook-up connections are an invitation to death and disease.First, a pop quiz. Hey, Pop, what. s the one thing you do not want to be standing in when you plug in your electrical cord? And, what's an excellent way to contaminate your drinking water? The answers to this little brain teaser can be found at a Lone Pine-area campground I kinda enjoyed this past autumn. There, amid the towering pines and rabid squirrels was a campsite designed by the Devil himself. The electrical hook-up box was loosely nailed to a tree. right above the dripping water faucet. What better way to turn the unsuspecting RVer into a giant piece of burnt toast. And, to complete the threat to my life and continuing pursuit of happiness, the sewer pipe opening was three inches from my water filter. No self-respecting dysentery bug could resist pole-vaulting from the sewer line to the water line.

But, hey, I'm grinning. Somehow I avoided getting shocked and a terminal case of the trots. But you guys might not be so lucky. So, at least be careful, and complain to the RV park. That. s the only way some things get changed.

Occasionally, I have been criticized for allegedly infusing this column with an overabundance of gripes, versus a paltry sum of grins. Alright, perhaps I do tend to look at life through poop-coated glasses. But that's just part of my charm.

However, in deference to my detractors (both of 'em) and to start the new year off right, I will attempt to stuff this particular column with cheery, positive, and positively yucky-sweet comments. For instance: I frequently gripe about RV accessory manufacturers. unwillingness or inability to produce quality goods. Well, today I am grinning as I actually praise a product. Specifically, a new sewer hose. Yeah, I know. Not exactly up there with antibiotics, giant steps on the moon, breast and bun implants, or other miracles of science. Still, any improvement in those delightful dumping duties is worthy of praise.

This sewer hose, by Sewer Master, is easier to fit with hose end attachments, easier to store in the hatch, takes up very little storage room and is reportedly longer lived. Having used it on my last campout, I can certainly vouch for the first three; that durability boast will take some time to substantiate. The Sewer Master stretches from its carrying length of 40 inches to a maximum of 12 feet or anywhere in between. It remains at the exact desired length - no kinks where  stuff. can accumulate. for as long as needed, and then is easily returned to its 40-inch length for storage. The Sewer Master costs a bit more than a heavy duty ordinary hose, but, in my humble opinion, is worth the splurge. The SewerMaster hose is available from Phase Four Industries; call toll free: 877-787-8833.

Last Updated Wednesday, December 06 2006 @ 04:34 PM Pacific